First Session: The Goblin/Kobold Defense

Surion the Magnificent Wizard, Velma the sneaky half-elf rogue, Finnean the Fiery Fighter dwarf ventured into the cave after a short and sweet conversation with Buff Hardback, who informed them 1) entries into the cave are scheduled regularly 2) other groups of adventurers had gone in and NOT RETURNED and 3) if they return without the orb, they're gonna be in a world of pain (the Aevulking don't play like that brah). Journeying downwards, they found a small antechamber. Beyond, they could see a large cavern where several guard kobolds and goblins sat chatting and eating their filthy goblin gruel around some campfires. Velma's keen half-elven eyes were able to espy a thin, gossamer strand stretching across the doorway. Both she and Surion let loose with their bows, injuring two of the goblins. Alerted, the goblins with crossbows ran to get behind two shoddily constructed barricades. Unfortunately, in returning into the antechamber after taking a shot, Velma's feet were not as keen as her eyes. She tripped over the wire. A large bell sonorously resounded, waking two armored goblins that had been fast asleep in a treasure room off of the main cavern. To add insult to injury, one of the crossbow goblins, steadying his aim on the barricade, managed to land a quarrel straight into her left ass cheek, severely injuring the half-elf. After a few more seconds of back-and-forth archery (and a goblin mage slinging frightening purple missiles of arcance potency), Finnean had had enough, charging out of the room at one of the barricades. At the same time, Surion magicked several magicks moft potent and lulled one of the crossbow goblins and both spear kobolds at the other barricade, as well as one of the awoken armored goblins, to sleep. The goblins before finnean fled to the relative safety of their sleeping comrades' barricade, and he got a but a piece of one as it did. The goblin mage took the fight to the adventurers, entering the antechamber and warming up a terrifying cone of fire from his hands. Unfortunately for him, Velma had remembered she was a rogue and deftly flipped out of the way. Drawing her bow, she nailed the unfortunate mage in the chest. Spewing ichor, he began to flee in terror. Surion cast an enlargement spell on Finnean, who used his mammoth size to eventually best the waking armored goblin in single combat, though he was beset by arrows from the crossbowmen across the room that yet lived. Beset, that is, until Velma's arrow exploded one of their heads. Both crossbowmen fled, one to the treasure room in the northeast corner and the other to another antechamber to the west. Surion and Velma followed the mage and crossbowmen to the room in the west, where they were pounding on a door. After dispatching them, Surion had a really really good listen and could faintly hear the snoring of several other small creatures on the other side, some distance away. Finnean, meanwhile, managed to chase the final remaining goblin into the treasure room in the northeast corner. Though Finnean Loomed Menacingly, the goblin overcame great odds to pull himself together, and then overcame greater odds to plant a quarrel straight in the magically giant dwarf's throat. Already weakened by multiple quarrels to the feet and shoulder and a gash from the cruel curv-ed scimitar of the armored goblin, Finnean fell making gurgling noises. The goblin, believing himself invincible, ran out into the main room and was promptly felled by Surion and Velma. Finnean, after a few seconds, did manage to stabilize himself and is out of danger for now. Surion went about slitting the throats of the sleeping enemies, and the team rejoined to the treasure room to see what they could see, and prepare to venture further into the cave...

Call to adventure: The Cave

Your characters are all, for whatever reasons you come up with, in the sleepy town of Robert's Mill, on the edge of the Wilds in the Eastmarch. It is a farming village with a minor garrison to defend against periodic raids by the Wildmen to the east, and its main feature is a mill owned by a brutal monopolist by the name of Bob. He insists that he be called Robert, but his parents really did just name him Bob. The town is unusually bustling--a glut of adventurers are hanging around, and as a result a glut of merchants have come to serve them [meaning you can buy whatever you can convince me would be found in a regular sized city, not just a tiny town]. Why so bustling, you ask? A Proclamation of the King! Your characters, whether reading it for the first time or having seen it elsewhere and come here as a result, read it thus: "HEAR YE HEAR YE A Royal Proclamation of King Klishayd Aevulkin, Thirteenth of His Name, Defender of the Westmarch, Eastmarch, Southwestmarch & other Marches &tc. To the Northeast of the King's Village of Robert's Mill, there is a cave infested with Goblins and Kobolds. Fear not, innocent citizens, for my faceless AevulTroopers are standing guard around the clock to prevent their escape. However, for those of you with more strength or skill, I have an offer which may interest you. It has come to my attention that, beneath the grottoes where the Kobolds linger, there is an ancient ruin built by the Ancient empire containing an artifact MOFT ANCIENT. I had sent in a detachment to retrieve it, but they have not returned. If you can retrieve for that artifact for your King, you will find it very rewarding. One Thousand Gold Pieces rewarding. To avoid any depopulation issues, please report your Adventuring Resume to the garrison at King's Mill One Week prior to attempting to enter the mine. If you are not up to snuff, my AevulTroopers will suggest a more suitable way you can help your King [for reals though, I've never balanced one of these things so please get me character sheets before we dive in so I can set up encounters and shit, lvl 2 characters (so you can actually do spells if you want to! You can leave your friends behind!) Adnd 3rd edition/the one we usually play (if you want to pick up some jacked up class from that wiki of jacked up classes I have no problem with that)]. I would send in another detachment, but my ghostly economic adviser Mul'Ton Frejdmum tells me that allowing you shmucks to try will still get me the artifact and at maximum only cost me 100 gold pieces, and "keep the rifks in the Sector Moft Private." On second thought, scribe, they don't need to know that. Hey, I said scratch that out! Don't write this down either! By the Beard of Maelor, you think you're clever, don't you?! Guard, kill this scri----------" A long line extends from the last letter. Your characters [should] know what they must do; band together and retrieve the artifact! Good luck (they're going to need it......).